[[project5]]

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project5 [2012/05/23 20:18] (current)
gm_oliver created
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 +====== Turn 5 Projects ======
 +===== Project Unite and Conquer =====
 +**Initiator:** A. Johnson \\
 +**Supervisor:** A. Johnson \\
 +**Serial Number:** Johnson-II-alpha \\
 +**Project Goals:** Merge all our competitors so we only have one to deal with.
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +The variety of rival corporations in the marketplace creates consumer confusion, and the Company's undoubted status as Market Leader allows these rivals to benefit from a 'plucky underdog' image. For this reason efforts should be made to encourage our business competitors to merge into a single uber-megacorporation. Further efforts to ensure this merged entity is a bloated, incoherent disaster will also be rewarded.
 +
 +===== Project Carnifex =====
 +
 +**Initiator**: B. Johnson \\
 +**Supervisor**: Johnson \\
 +**Serial Number**: b3092kjhs38xx732dchsg4os75j22fd \\
 +**Project Goal**: Develop and deploy the perfect worker
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +
 +Recent downsizing initiatives have left HR employees feeling drained and demotivated. Develop or discover a new, better form of employee which can ruthlessly downsize thousands of its fellow employees for hours without tiring, missing, or suffering from unproductive moral qualms.
 +
 +===== Project Market Perforation =====
 +
 +**Initiator:** M.Profit \\
 +**Supervisor:** M.Profit \\
 +**Serial Number:** GL0B4L \\
 +**Goal:** Expand the company's most successful products into stubborn markets
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +
 +Despite the company's premier portfolio of grade A products, their still exist stubborn markets such as Quebec where the citizens suffer without access to vital goods such as the CompShave┬« moustache enhancement solution or a cup of Happy Bean┬« coffee with which to start their morning. I want company products in every home in the world, and company outlets expanded to exist in every single city - even the ones that don't know they want it yet. Find a way to make it happen!
 +
 +
 +===== Project Party =====
 +
 +**Initiator:** Jake Bloom \\
 +**Supervisor:** Jake Bloom \\
 +**Serial Number:** 1aab23051b24582c5dc8e23fc595d505 \\
 +**Project Goals:** Party down!
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +
 +Party! Party! Party!
 +
 +===== Project Killbot Komman(o)s =====
 +
 +**Initiator:** Greg Lucas jnr III \\
 +**Supervisor:** Greg Lucas jnr III \\
 +**Serial Number:** 7394c62a5ejfjal99jkjk24kk2k \\
 +**Project Goal:** Take control of the killbots and repurpose them for profit \\
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +
 +Killbots are both a major potential customer base and a source of employees. Develop a way of remotely reprogramming killbots so that we can turn them into the perfect customers and employees. Loyal lab assistants who don't need to worry about the odd acid spill or wave after wave of unstoppable salesbots.
 +
 +
 +===== Project Smile! =====
 +**Initiator:** __REDACTED__ \\
 +**Supervisor:** __REDACTED__ \\
 +**Serial Number:** ++H++++++U++++++G++++++S++ \\
 +**Project Goal:** Increase consumer happiness
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +Recent Company projects, that have resulted in unprecedented levels of Success!, have also taken a severe toll on the number of consumers due to unforeseen collateral damage and asset devastation. Consumer despair is at all all time high and this has reduced spending on a wide variety of product lines. Find a way to cheer up the worldwide consumer base and get them spending.
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 +
 +===== Project Replicator Replicator =====
 +**Initiator:** MS \\
 +**Supervisor:** MS \\
 +**Serial Number:** NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN \\
 +**Project Goal:** Clean up the grey goo spill
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +Due to unprecedented changes in tidal patterns in recent fiscal quarters international shipping has become more hazardous. Due to a series of Health and Safety oversights a supertanker carrying 8 million gallons of the Company's Nanite based wart removal product has grounded off the coast of England, resulting in a massive spill. Get there and clean up that grey goo before it consumes any more sea birds...or sea. Don't let the environmental regulators find out! 
 +
 +===== Project SME =====
 +**Initator:** REDACTED \\
 +**Supervisor:** van Profitsing \\
 +**Serial Number:** 11-222-999-33b \\
 +**Project Goal:**  Acquire various small business that have recently been incorporated from company assets.
 +
 +==== Project Description ====
 +A number of small, high-mobile businesses have recently been started up. Paper trails indicate that these are leveraging company employees for both workforce and floorspace. Acquire these companies and perform an aggressive takeover. Silver actuarial equipment is available from the Stationery Bunker.
 +
 +//van Profitsing has recently gone missing; find him as part of the project so he can supervise it.//
project5.txt · Last modified: 2012/05/23 20:18 by gm_oliver
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